As I write this, I'm sitting at my dads computer in the house I grew up in. My visit began Saturday after a fantastic day at a horse barn in Biddeford, ME and then Sunday at a dog event in RI. Yesterday I did some "housekeeping" type stuff then took some time to go to Concord, MA and wander through the quaint downtown. I have happy memories of going there with my mom, picking candy at the old store with the cranky old woman who'd yell at you to POINT to the penny candy you wanted. Mom explained she was probably deaf and for us not to take her anger personally.
Today I was at another dog event and it was quite interesting. Rarely am I ticked off enough by someones negativity to call them on it. Today was an exception.
I know I have a different take on life and an unconventional job. I also know that I love what I do and that I'm good at it. I don't view this as the devils work (its never been an option on a job application so how can that job exist?) and that it does make some people uncomfortable. Here's the deal. If you're standing near me, cursing me in your head and wising me to disappear, I CAN HEAR YOU. So either come up to me and ask me to leave, ask me some questions so maybe we can agree to disagree, or at least give me the opportunity to get up and leave instead of you doing everything possible to "will" me to do it on my own. I hate that. And I'm fully aware that I get to chose how I react to someone. So I'm owning my reaction.
Overall, today I met some wonderful people. I also got to add to my increasing list of how I don't want to treat people. To the control freak woman who did her best to let everyone around her feel as if she was doing the wold a huge favor by taking time to slum with us annoying people, I heard you. When I was in the bathroom washing my hands I seriously debated telling you how poorly you do the fake smile and that when you moved your table INTO mine how nice it would have been for you to look me in the eye (or even in my general direction at all, actually) and asked me to work with you to find a solution to the drama you were creating. Or to tell me to go to hell. Even that would have been better.
What's frustrating is that I knew I have the ability to block her energy, but I apparently I didn't do a super good job. At one point I tried sending her love, but holy smokes it was tough! She must be exhausted!!!!
Do I feel better now that I've vented? Meh. Only a little. When I was young I had my mom to tell me not to let that cranky penny candy lady upset me. I learned to just point and be very clear in what I wanted. So today will probably be another lesson learned. Once I let that nasty woman go. Guess I'm not quite over it, huh?!
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